Philippine Hell

A fellow died and went to hell where he found that hell was set up by country, just like the way it is on the globe, and each country had its own type of hell.

First, he went to Germany's hell and asked, "What kind of hell do you have here?"

He was told, "First, you are placed in an electric chair for an hour. Then, you are laid on a bed of nails for another hour. Finally, the German devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The guy did not like what he heard, so he moved on.

He checked out America's hell, Russia's hell, and all the other countries' hell only to discover that they were all the same as Germany's hell. . .until he came to the Philippines' hell, where there was a very long line of people waiting to get in.

Amazed he asked, "What do they do here?"

He was told, "First, they put you in an electric chair for an hour. Then, they lay you on a bed of nails for another hour. Finally, the Filipino devil comes in and whips you for the rest of the day."

The fellow retorted: "But that is exactly the same as all the other hells -- so, why are there so many people waiting to get in here?"

Then came the answer: "Well, because here, there is always a brownout, so the electric chair does not work, and somebody stole all the nails to sell. Most importantly, the Filipino devil is actually a former government official, who comes in always late, writes down on his timecard the time he thinks is the "proper time", shakes hands and bullshits with as many of his pals as he can, after several long coffee breaks in between, he writes down the time he thinks is the "proper time" to leave on his time card, and then takes off until the next day!" -Author Unknown